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Confidence, Self Improvement, Dating

From OKCupid to the coffee shop - online dating

From OKCupid to the Coffee Shop: Turn Online Dating Into Real World Connection

Online dating can be exciting, fun, tedious and alienating, sometimes in the same day. Ultimately, dating web sites like OkCupid are just tools introduce you to people. They can’t really do anything for you besides make the introduction. That said, there...

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The joy of embodiment

The joy of embodiment: learning to love “butterflies”

You know that feeling you get before you approach a woman you're interested in? "Butterflies" in the stomach? Or maybe you feel jittery, tense, shaky? I used to avoid it. I didn't like it. I considered it to be something wrong—I had the idea that if I were...

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Podcasts which have improved my life - Tim Ferris, Daniel Vitalis and more

5 Podcasts Which Have Improved My Life

I read a lot, but reading gets tiring—it involves too much sitting still, and is just one narrow avenue for acquiring knowledge. Lately I've enjoyed some great podcasts, mostly interviews with fascinating people on a wide range of topics, many to do with...

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Rube Goldberg

Life as a Rube Goldberg Device

Sometimes life is like a Rube Goldberg device: a complex, convoluted, ridiculous series of ropes, pullies, levers, and rolling balls—which have to run in a very specific sequence in order for it to work. As you watch a real Rube Goldberg device, especially...

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Problem Solving: Is there something I'm missing here?

One of the most important questions for your self development

Have you ever turned a problem over and over in your head, tried to work through it, to find a solution, but...nothing? It may be, to you, a hard, vexing, messy problem you feel you can't solve. That's where an important question comes in.

The human...

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10,000 hours of pickup is a lot

Pickup and The 10,000 Hour Rule

"Are you participating in something here, or just hanging out?" was my opening line (no line at all, really). And so began the interaction. I failed (but succeeded, read on for that part), but my failure got me thinking about the value of practice, of...

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You're Not Fine Just The Way You Are--Why This is Bullshit

You’re Not Fine Just The Way You Are—Why This is Bullshit

A lot of self help and dating advice comes back to the same point—that you're fine just the way you are, or that you should just "be yourself". I call bullshit.

The fact is, many of us have a lot of work to do, myself included. When you play an...

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Why I bother writing for a tiny audience

Why I Bother Writing For a Tiny Audience

This blog is full of advice: don't give up, persist, keep learning and striving. And I believe this advice—if I didn't believe it wouldn't write it. But sometimes, doubt creeps in. Why am I doing this? Why do I bother? I don't have many readers. I hope to...

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Yoga Warrior 3: How to get in touch with your body

5 Ways to Get In Touch With Your Body

I recently read an article title "Why Men Are Obsessed With Sex" which argues that men's disassociation from sensuality, feelings and vulnerability are why we are obsessed with sex. The article makes some good points, though I thought it was a bit black and...

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